GirlTrash Movie Reviewed

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This is it.  What some of us have been waiting 4 years for.  The movie we were promised, GirlTrash: All Night Long.  I saw the trailer over a year ago, and finally got the DVD this past Tuesday.  I’ve watched it THREE times already… And not just to get my money’s worth (because who pays $30 for a movie anymore??  Let’s be honest.. we torrent movies or wait until they are $5 at Walmart).  This movie is what I had hoped it to be.  This is my face while I’m watching:  :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

YES.  It looks like all those colons and capital D’s.

The movie is so effing funny.  If you want to see the actresses you love, then this movie is a must see.  It has major characters of The L Word seasons 5-6, an appearance by Megan Cavanagh of Exes and Ohs, stars of South of Nowhere, and stars from the Web-series, Girl Trash, in which the movie is sorta based.

SPOILERS starting here.

It starts out with Daisy, played by Lisa Rieffel, running in on Tyler and some girl.. one of the many girls Tyler sleeps with.  I’m not sure why media thinks thin, dark and messy haired girls are irresistible. Shane isn’t my first choice girl on The L Word… but that’s just me.  In fact, Michelle Lombardo is super pretty without the Shane-ish make over.

This scene opens the audience up to the humor already.  Daisy makes fun of the sex and walks out talking about Tyler’s other girl.  Then she breaks out into song, and Tyler’s guest asks “Why is she singing?”  HA.  Although Daisy’s character is a bit annoying, she’s the funniest, and the best singer of all of the group.

The whole movie is about the band Alotta Flame getting onto stage for Band Slam.  Everything else happens in between.  Including hooking up Daisy’s sister, Colby (played by Gabrielle Christian), with her crush, Misty.  Of course, I know you are all like me… waiting for Mandy Musgrave (i.e. Misty) to show up.. I give you one big wink:

wink

Daisy is a bit against Colby suddenly being gay, but, can you even blame Colby for wanting to get up with Misty?  uhm, no.

“Colby you never even touched your own Vagina, let alone anyone elses’.” HA. Daisy says the best stuff.  “You rented it?  Colby, gawd, you’re a creeper, seriously.”

Scene.  Colby speaks to Misty for the first time that night at the club.  AWKWARD.  and so sad.  Then in walks Sid, or as we know her Nikki from the L Word.  Playing the valley girl again.

Tyler gets Sid and Misty to join the group for a car ride… because they’re stupid and believe what Tyler says.  Talk talk talk, super talk in the car.  Then “raise your hand, if you wanna get laid tonight, … if you just turned gay tonight.”  This song … will get stuck in your head.  I’ve been singing it non-stop since Tuesday.

Next: out breaks Rose Rollins in rap.  WTF?!  This was so effing awesome.  I almost creamed with excitement, that’s how awesome that was…  Dr. Monique is BAD ASS.  Scaring the white chicks into giving her money back, getting out of prison, jumping into that BAD ASS gansta car.

Back to girls in car: Tyler tells a stupid story about Colby and Angelina Jolie..  Sid and Misty are stupid girls  and believe it *rolls eyes*.  Sid is all like “You didn’t hook up with Angelina Jolie because she’s married?”  Good morals.  Good morals.  THIS is what California girls are like?  werd.  Furthermore, these girls seriously followed Tyler’s old band, Jaded Lipstick, ROFL: “My mother is a bitch.  My mother is a bitch.  I’m going to cut her breasts off.”  Misty likes Tyler because of THAT memory.. what does Colby see in this chick?

mandy

ooooh yeah, that.

Then there is another song about fantasies, which is also AWESOME. “Don’t shit on my dream, it’s just my fantasy.  Of what could possibly be, but it won’t be.”  This song is between Colby and Misty to show how the girls to connect.  Some place else in the club Daisy sings “when you close your eyes do you still see my face”… awesomely, when she sees Zan, her ex, played by Clementine Ford (who we all know as Molly from The L Word).

FIIIIIIGHT.

fight

encounter 1 with monique: Colby loses her car, the band loses their equipment.  Shoulda dropped Tyler awhile ago… but then Tyler steals Kelly’s car.. so maybe Daisy should still keep her around.  To get monees, the girls decide to sell the drugs in Kelly’s car.  Where do they decide to sell the drugs?  At Colby’s sorority house.

There we find Lauren aka Malaya Drew aka The L Word’s Adele Channing.  Sorority President… always trying to be on top *smh*  Lots of interesting things happen here.  Colby and Misty connect over Space Camp.  Sid gives Misty some wise advice, which results in Misty’s heart being crushed.  Zan tells Daisy she has no talent, DAUM.  Colby comes out to Lauren, and then Lauren shows Colby how to have fake sex…  Colby and Tyler have fake sex…    Sid is stupid again and has sex with the creeper “uncle”.. Monique attacks, and scares the ENTIRE house of girls ROFL.

This ends with the group of girls going to jail, where Daisy’s and Colby’s mom comes to bail them out… and, my gawd.  This woman can’t even talk with all the plastic surgery.  Obviously doesn’t care about the girls..  There’s this whole scene with the group getting out of the car and singing and such.  I love the song (I still can’t get over the fact that Lisa Rieffel’s voice is so good), and the colors and lights.  But.. I feel like this scene is really out of place and the movie could have done without it.  Shoulda been another scene with Rapper Dr. Monique haha

rose

Finally, the group gets to Band Slam.  Not gonna lie, all the bands there are pretty awesome.   I only feel slight loyalty for Alotta Flame. I like all the music.  Person who did the music for this movie = amazing.  There is a showdown back stage between Zan’s ex-girlfriend’s band and Zan’s current girlfriend’s band.  It seems as though Kelly may have gotten into Daisy’s head.  But later we see that Tyler can talk Daisy into rocking it out!  Then they perform my favorite song in the whole movie: “Much happier without you.  And as I walk out, here’s an ass to kiss.  My tomorrow’s all brand new.”  OMG Zan’s face.  Come on… Rieffel’s voice (turns out she’s in a band called Killola.. bout to check them out, son).  So awesome.

Meanwhile… Colby and Misty make-up (from all the previous drama), and end up having that BACKSTAGE SEX RAMPAGE.  woot, getitgirl!

Of course, Dr. Monique gets her moneys from Tyler when the band wins.  The End.

This movie has all the elements I loved about D.E.B.S. and then some.  I recommend it to any Lesbian who is familiar with these actresses, because this will definitely be more of a treat.  The music is so catchy, and creative.

I don’t know what happened with Angela Robinson and Power Up.. but both parties should be proud of the movie they created, because it’s wonderful.  The actresses also deserve a round of applause, which they unfortunately won’t get except from our beds and couches.

SO FUNNY.

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2 thoughts on “GirlTrash Movie Reviewed

  1. Candie July 17, 2014 / 9:52 am

    Hey 🙂
    I see you are also a big fan of gt!
    Well…I have problems with some passages in the song San Fernando Rose because I am no native speaker and would need some help.
    If you could help me that would be great!
    Candie

    Like

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